18 Apr Goldfish & Jesus
Goldfish & Jesus
“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
This past week, I was telling my mother of an incident that had occurred awhile back with my son. We had been in a public setting where children had been eating goldfish snacks. My son was quick to find one on the floor and chomp on it. That boy is like a garbage disposal. He loves food and is like the Flash when he eats it. I didn’t get to him in time and to my dismay, realized he had eaten something he was allergic to. This incident happened about an hour before bedtime. He did not show any signs of a reaction from eating that small goldfish. I put him to bed and all was fine, so I thought. In the middle of the night, I heard him let out a weird cough. Nothing more. My gut told me to check on him. My body told me to go to sleep. I listened to the latter. I will probably always feel guilty for not having gone to his room that night. In the morning, I discovered that the small goldfish he ingested provoked him to throw up. He slept on his vomit. I cried.
Having a child with multiple food allergies changes the game more than people think. For starters, I believe we as parents set ourselves up for failure in a sense. There is so much at stake, and any small slip-up could be the difference between life or death. At the same time, we cannot control every single thing happening and are bound to miss something. This is not what I would want to hear as a parent. In fact, if I could bubble wrap my child from all dangerous foods, I would. Life doesn’t work that way. I have to continuously release my child to God and pray for His ultimate protection and perfect timing. If not, I would probably drive myself insane with trying to avoid any potential incident.
And then I’m reminded of Jesus Christ. How in the world could our Father in Heaven allow Jesus to die for us? As a parent, I could not fathom this. I’d rather die than let my child suffer even a taste of an allergen-ridden food. Yet, that is what He did. He allowed the only One who was able to carry the weight of the world. For us. And this weight He carried? It also included guilt and shame. I shouldn’t punish myself forever for the guilt of my choice of continuing to sleep. I chose wrong. But I cannot stay there with that mindset. I have to move forward and learn from that mistake.
Oh, and I did learn. A later incident of an ingested Dorito allowed me to go quickly to my son’s room that night. And this time, the proper actions were taken and he was able to sleep on a clean bed.